Many colleges and universities require you to live on campus for your freshman year, and this usually means living in a cramped dorm room with a bathroom down the hall, no air conditioning, annoying neighbors, the smell of old pizza and beer, and every kind of strange, interesting, funny, or annoying person you could imagine. Most incoming freshman are paired with a complete stranger as a roommate. but usually it’s the people on your floor who can drive you to drink (if you weren’t already). So here are some of the more common characters to anticipate:
1.) The Drinker
I guarantee that you meet (or at least hear) this special breed of freshman within your first week of school. We’re not talking about someone who goes out on a Friday or Saturday night; The Drinker spends most nights going to parties (he or she may take a break on Sunday). The male and female versions of The Drinker are essentially the same: they stroll into the building at 3am, make as much noise as possible to alert everyone on the floor of their Drinker status, and sleep until 4pm. Class is optional, and rarely attended.
2.) The Music-Blaster
One of the more intrusive types of dorm inhabitants. He or she typically spends most days and nights with music (usually techno/house/rap music – you’ll never hear any good classic rock) blaring their tunes in case, not unlike The Drinker, someone doesn’t yet know just how awesome The Music-Blaster really is.
3.) The No-Sandals Communal-Shower-Taker
Seriously, do you know what people do in those shared showers? Neither do I, but I could definitely take a guess. Shell out three bucks for a pair of flip-flops at Wal-Mart – your feet will thank you.
4.) The Person Whose Door is Always Open (Literally)
Every time you walk by this room, expect an awkward glance from the person inside. He or she may pretend not to notice you passing, but there’s only one reason to have your door open all the time: so everyone else can see exactly what’s going on inside the room. Doors don’t prop themselves open! Whip out your cell phone and pretend to be doing something when walking past this room in the hall.
5.) The Always-on-The-Phone-in-the-Hallway Person
Ok, this guy or girl gets some credit for at least being considerate of his or her roommate and not talking in the room. By all means, talk in the hall, just don’t go overboard. Not everyone on the floor wants to hear about the intricacies of your last English exam, your relationship troubles, or how you’d really like to go home this weekend, but there’s a big party at so-and-so frat and you have homework to do and you’ll let them know soon. That’s what Facebook is for.
These are just a few examples of the diverse array of personalities and idiosyncrasies that can be found on nearly every floor of every dorm. There are many, many more; unfortunately, I just don’t have the space to describe The Studier, The Insomniac, or The Guy Always Checking Himself Out in the Mirror.
Maybe next time!
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Stefan – this is awesome! If anyone else wants to share some advice for freshmen, just let me know!